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How to Win Over a Manager by Not Saying a Word

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All of us have managers and other employees that we have to work with and most of us genuinely want those that we are around to like us and include us in on the projects that we are working on. Having favor either from your boss, supervisor or customer can be a very big deal to your career and your success level. And finding this favor is often a chess match game of some sorts. We are always trying to figure out what things our bosses and customers want from us and we try to give that to them. Unfortunately, many of us immediately think that we should share our knowledge or expertise in a proactive way in order to gain this favor. But what if that’s not what they wanted at all. What if those who you want to impress only want you to be interested in them?

If you think back at your life and observing you and those around you, you will most likely notice that the people that we find the most fascinating are those who show interest in us. In other words, it is sometimes best to just not say hardly anything at all, but focus your efforts on genuinely listening to others. I struggle with this more than anyone. I always seem to fight focusing on what I want to say next rather than concentrating on listening to the other person. If you try this, I will bet that you will find that the best way to make people interested in you is to just be interested in them.

In fact, the people that I personally notice that I truly enjoy being around and those that I feel the most comfortable and confident around are the people that noticeably seem to have an interest in me. These are the people that I “Feel” are the most talented conversationalists, networkers and those who seem very warm and trustworthy. Along with the ability to give off that vibe to most of the people that they are around, they also come across as very confident and knowledgeable simply from their ability to restrain themselves from demonstrating their own knowledge of something. Those who come across as the most knowledgeable are those who seem to seek knowledge from us and store that information for their use.

This is probably one of the hardest things for a successful producer to achieve. However, having this ability shows maturity, restraint and leads ultimately to great success. This philosophy goes against everything that seems and feels natural, but it is well worth the effort to learn this skill. From my experience, it has been of great help in networking with colleagues and gaining acceptance from those who have influence.